Watch out for Legjacking –


A simulated legjacking

With the explosion within the numbers of other folks competing in long-distance races, runners are in search of any edge they  can get. For some time, runners took efficiency bettering medicine, PEG. (Observe, right here PEG is an anacronym, now not any girl named Peg.) Anyway some weeks in the past, marathoner Carl L. a. Fong up and grew a 3rd leg in a single day. He lowered his race time by way of 39 mins.

As of press time, no marathon organizers have addressed the problem of a 3rd leg. Such a lot of unscrupulous marathoners are in search of a 3rd leg. As there aren’t many prison tactics to obtain leg (Opposite to not unusual trust, Costco(tm) doesn’t elevate the whole lot), runners are turning to violence.

Legjacking. They’re purchasing their 5th limb by way of legjacking, the place the foul fiend knocks you down and pulls off your leg. Isn’t this painful?


And you’ll kiss good-bye your individual possibilities of profitable a marathon.

What are you able to do to keep away from legjacking?

Stay a wholesome distance between your self and all are compatible other folks with legs so long as yours.

It’s now not at all times conceivable to do this on account of crowds and stampeding herds of escaped elephants. So, I like to recommend sporting garlic cloves for your fingers each time  you move out. Merely pop the garlic cloves into your mouth and munch away each time you spot a most likely leg thief. Your robust garlic breath will deter any legjacker. But even so, garlic repels vampires as neatly. And that’s excellent.

Ensure to enroll in me for long run well being guidelines. Bye bye now, Keep wholesome.


– Paul De Lancey, The Comedian Chef, Ph.D.


Take a look at my newest novel, the hilarious apocalyptic mystery, Do Lutheran Hunks Devour Mushrooms? It’s revealed by way of HumorOutcasts and is to be had in paperback or Kindle on



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